Twitter Mind Control: Forbidden Twitter Marketing Secrets - The Intrepid

Saturday, August 01, 2009

Twitter Mind Control: Forbidden Twitter Marketing Secrets

Twitter Mind Control

This is one of the dumbest products I've ever seen. According to Kenneth Yu, the confidence man "marketer" behind these videos, the Twitter Mind Control series can teach you "the Forbidden Art of TWITTER MIND CONTROL" and how "to Seduce Your Prospects, Siphon Their Wallets DRY, and Spread YOUR Marketing Gospel."

Hot damn! And all for the low low price of just $27.

But that's not all, the Twitter Mind Control series can also teach you how to "Turn on the Cashflow of Tears" (whatever the hell that means) and how to "ReTweet your follower's props of you!" Amazing! You can retweet the messages of a single follower now? Thanks Yu!

But wait, there's more.

"So I kept searching and searching until I came up my "crazy Twitter idea" which is the first experience I ever had with what I call "TAS" or "Taming the Animal Spirits". TAS combines the shocking secret of a little-know Keynesian economic principle together with something else I developed called "Ambient Intimacy"...These "Taming the Animal Sprits" secrets can be used by anyone. Whether you are a work-at-home mom, a student or someone who is unemployed. And, if you have a website or blog, these secrets can generate so much cash-flow, you will actually have a hard time getting all the money to the bank... Even during this recession! I'm not kidding."

I'm not sure what an "Animal Sprit" is (is it the same as a spirit?), or how to tame it, but apparently it's money in the bank!

"A price this good will not stay low for long. This price will increase WITHOUT WARNING in a few weeks time...So take action NOW, because this offer can disappear at any time. Rush below and enroll right NOW."

Oh nos! If I don't buy Twitter Mind Control now, I'll never learn how to use @ symbols to subjugate the helpless masses.

Screenshot is from (I think the URL actually sums this product up pretty well).